depression sucks...., heart broken Options

[MKIVSUPRA]

here's my story. i know there's been many threads of people with broken hearts. here's mine.

I met this girl through her brother. At first I never liked her in the first place, i always felt she was off limits cause you know how that stuff works between friends and i have a sister myself.... Yeah, I'm vietnamese and she's vietnamesese, so yeah it was her graduation for high school. her family didn't really celebrate it.... so i felt sorry for her and bought her a graduation balloon to cheer her up. Soon we talked more on aim and she was happy.

one day her bro decided to become a monk ( yeah im telling the truth) cause he used to gangbang, steal cars, sell drugs, but he was religious and believed in kharma and one day decided that he should just give in. I felt sorry for her again because she really didn't have anybody to talk to at that moment and she was pretty close with her brother. So i came to visit her at work brought her food and talk to her on aim. well time passed by and she kept putting stuff in her profile like songs trying to get me to fall in love with her. i took her out to eat several times to try to get to know her. When I like somebody i would like to know what im getting into.

She got really fed up one day that i couldn't respond to her because of all the stuff she put in her profile. Then she started hating me and ignoring me. She thought i was playing with her mind when i wasn't. I was just trying to know her. I did not want to risk a friendship by falling in love if it's wrong. I believe that things would only work out if you give it your 100%. At the time I was focused on my schooling and im in college. I barely have any time for anything. I fell in love with her so when i asked her out...... she said "too be honest with you, I want to focus on school because my parents are moving to texas and i want to stay in california and live on my own" she wanted to have enough credits to transfer. So I just played along and said yeah i understand and i respect that....

I felt really depressed for a while and never really showed her i was depressed. I just wanted her happy. Then 3 weeks later I saw on myspace that she was dating another guy and he looks like an asshole. I tried to forget her by ignoring her, avoiding her, and not talking to her. and still all i can think is her. She also changed because she works with these airheaded girls i know at a tea place where asian peopel get together. I feel liek ****, depressed, useless, out of it, i dropped of my math classes, i tried to talking friends but they all have their own stuff to do. My best friend joined the army and all i have is friends that dont really care so i never talk to them. Family doesn't really care either.. but my education. I dont knwo what to do or to escape this pain i feel. well thanks for reading because im lost... usually i have never felt so depressed in my life and i have been throught a lot of crap... not only that my dad got laid off, I got into a car crash, im barely passing my english class and my job i work at is degrading. i have no one to really talk to and understand.. my best friend is in iraq.....

This post has been edited by MKIVSUPRA: Dec 18, 2005 - 1:38 AM

[lagos]

you got girl problems, i fee bad for you son. i got 99 problems but a bitch aint one!










lol sorry just felt like saying that

[Supersprynt]

When you say "gangbang"... do you mean, he was in a gang, or that he was involved in frequent orgies? Just curious.

But I'm kinda confused here. You went out with her a couple times, talked to her on aim, and fell in love with her? I dont know if im getting this right.

This post has been edited by Supersprynt: Dec 18, 2005 - 1:44 AM

[MKIVSUPRA]

When you say "gangbang"... do you mean, he was in a gang, or that he was involved in frequent orgies? Just curious.

gang. yeah i know my story sounds all weird and funny but its all true

This post has been edited by MKIVSUPRA: Dec 18, 2005 - 1:41 AM

[lagos]

ok ...so i finally read you post...lol

she said "too be honest with you, I want to focus on .....(insert dumb excuse here)

if you ever hear that line from a girl again, it ALWAYS means that she found another guy. i had some chick i was dating, years ago tell me the same thing, then i found out she was cheating on me.

girls are all about 2 things..... 1. DRAMA. 2. mind games. the younger they are the more they do it. luckly later on in life they tend to grow out of it.

she used to like you, but you were not agressive enough. girls are looking for someone to step in and take the lead. while you were trying to just be friends with her, some guy steped in and took the lead.

the only way you can get over it is by finding a hotter girl then her. then you will forget about her and she will start to think of you again.... and the cycle will continue.

[MKIVSUPRA]

ok ...so i finally read you post...lol

she said "too be honest with you, I want to focus on .....(insert dumb excuse here)

if you ever hear that line from a girl again, it ALWAYS means that she found another guy. i had some chick i was dating, years ago tell me the same thing, then i found out she was cheating on me.

girls are all about 2 things..... 1. DRAMA. 2. mind games. the younger they are the more they do it. luckly later on in life they tend to grow out of it.

she used to like you, but you were not agressive enough. girls are looking for someone to step in and take the lead. while you were trying to just be friends with her, some guy steped in and took the lead.

the only way you can get over it is by finding a hotter girl then her. then you will forget about her and she will start to think of you again.... and the cycle will continue.

thanks man. yeah i feel dumb for even making this thread but i have no one to talk to... i knwo im lame but i need help! the day i found out she was with another guy was athe day i started to become a jerk. I did things i normally wouldn't do. I just didn't give a ____ , but it still doesn't work. i thought of crazy things like joinning the army to better myself to keep myself from being a an asshole like. i guess nice guys finish last.... i dont evne know any more

[lagos]

umm dont go joing the army over this...lol and you dont have to turn into an asshole

you have understand that this world has like 10billion women in it. the next one that comes along with be a million times hotter, and youll forget all about this girl .

also remember that there is no way that you could have loved her. you barely know they girl, you just love the way she made you feel. any other girl can give you that same feeling you love so much .

[dlx742]

almost the exact same thing happened to me with my last gf of which i had a 10 month relationship with.

except to make things worse, the guy that she found after i was a loser and didnt ask her out soon enough was my best friend. that didnt make things to good for my friendship with him. so i was depressed and sucked at life. but one day i listened to some Pantera and realized that i could focus my hate for them into energy to get things done. so i started working really hard at school, baseball, and working out. i got a 3.8 gpa that semester (brought up from a 3.2), was starting catcher for all but one game, and worked my way up from being able to bench 120 lbs to being able to lift 250 lbs.

so i guess what im trying to say is. dont let this destroy your life because it is just a short chapter in it. something that i ahve learned is that everything always works out in the end so go out there tomorow and work your hardest and give your all at everything you do

[ILuvMyCelica95]

ok ...so i finally read you post...lol

she said "too be honest with you, I want to focus on .....(insert dumb excuse here)

if you ever hear that line from a girl again, it ALWAYS means that she found another guy. i had some chick i was dating, years ago tell me the same thing, then i found out she was cheating on me.

girls are all about 2 things..... 1. DRAMA. 2. mind games. the younger they are the more they do it. luckly later on in life they tend to grow out of it.

she used to like you, but you were not agressive enough. girls are looking for someone to step in and take the lead. while you were trying to just be friends with her, some guy steped in and took the lead.

the only way you can get over it is by finding a hotter girl then her. then you will forget about her and she will start to think of you again.... and the cycle will continue.

First off, not all girls are about 2 things. Immature high school girls are about these things.

Time heals all wounds, yes this is cliche but it is true, finding another girl who is hotter to maker her jealous and come back to you is not exactly the best idea. You need to take a step back and look at this situation as a whole. It does not seem like you knew eachother all that well. She sounds immature (idk how old either of you are but i'm assuming your fairly young) If she didn't want to wait for you to "take the lead" eventhough she clearly had an interest in you then that is her loss. When it comes to this kind of thing I understand that I can make you feel horrible like you werent good enough and this guy is somehow better. You need to look at it differently then that. It's not your fault she moved on. That was her choice and if she chooses to make that mistake and not get to know you for the good person you are then SHE is not worth it.

Belive me I've delt with the depression thing, I know what it's like, and I know it could be worse. You need to take life one thing at a time when you feel this way. Looking at every problem you have all at once is overwhelming.

i think i've rambled enough.

[MKIVSUPRA]

yeah im slowly moving on but it's hard. i still think about how i screwed up. i try to do everything at once i try to make everyone happy but in the end im not happy. i'll try to get rid of my problems one by one and hopefully god will guide me through.

[Supersprynt]

Everyones going to say: Oh it's her loss and you can do better and things will work out and all that BS. Honestly, who the hell knows? Trying to make you feel better, sure. Does it? No. Theres only 1 person who can solve your problem and its you. **** happens, theres nothing you can do about it, theres nothing anybody can do about it, theres no "plan". This is just one of many times you'll get hurt. And what you can do to make it worthwhile, is learn. Learn so that the next time you dont make the same mistake, and when you make a different one, learn from that. Because one day you wont get hurt and one day all this BS that happened from now til then will be worthwhile. Pain dont last forever and its not wise to change your school schedule around or go into the army, thats like giving up on yourself. Remind yourself its just feelings that its not the end of the world that there will be another girl and if that one doesnt work then another. This is the thing I think about every single day since me and my girlfriend of 3 1/2 years broke up, and she is now going out with my now ex-bestfriend. You gotta sit there and prevent yourself from hating everybody and saying that you cant trust anybody ever again and you dont wanna love ever again but dont ever let heartache ruin the rest of ur life.

This post has been edited by Supersprynt: Dec 18, 2005 - 2:43 AM

[MKIVSUPRA]

i know i am the only one that can solve my problems, but i feel i need to let it out some how. i feel trapped and i can't escape. I feel numb inside. I'm not a total geek..... i tried going to parties, meeting new people, fixing my car, and talking to other girls , but it just doesn't feel the same. i just wish she could have at least talk to me like a friend still instead of ignoring me and pretending i dont exist. i accepted the fact that she has another guy.... I dont understand why she didn't tell me she had a bf instead of giving me hope taht she was actually going to school to better herself. the hope she gave me was my downfalll and it hurts a lot more.

This post has been edited by MKIVSUPRA: Dec 18, 2005 - 3:01 AM

[amysmojo]

Im sorry about all ur bad luck lately. I have had my own depression too because of stupid boys who play games w/ me & ive also been depressed because of other crap that has happened to my whole family this year. This year has sucked so much for all of us I just want it to END.

Oh so tell me...what is your longest relationship MKIVSUPRA? and how old are u??

[Supersprynt]

i know i am the only one that can solve my problems, but i feel i need to let it out some how. i feel trapped and i can't escape. I feel numb inside. I'm not a total geek..... i tried going to parties, meeting new people, fixing my car, and talking to other girls , but it just doesn't feel the same. i just wish she could have at least talk to me like a friend still instead of ignoring me and pretending i dont exist. i accepted the fact that she has another guy.... I dont understand why she didn't tell me she had a bf instead of giving me hope taht she was actually going to school to better herself. the hope she gave me was my downfalll and it hurts a lot more.

You should really not talk to/see her at all.

[BlackCelicaGT94]

ok ...so i finally read you post...lol

she said "too be honest with you, I want to focus on .....(insert dumb excuse here)

if you ever hear that line from a girl again, it ALWAYS means that she found another guy. i had some chick i was dating, years ago tell me the same thing, then i found out she was cheating on me..

so very true! i just told a guy 2 weeks ago that I wanted to focus on bettering myself but it was really cuz I met another boy.

Give it a few weeks and ull be over the girl. Also there are SOOOO many people in this world that theres no reason to be down if someone parts ways with you.

[bloodrain]

I feel you on ur problem bro, Im going thru the same crap except me and my gf broke up after 2 years and now xmas is coming and Im used to splitting the day between family's and stuff. But now my parents are going out of town, and I have nowhere to spend xmas with. So many thoughts will come back. But all you can do is keep on moving, try not to think about it, just keep convicing yourself that there are MANY other girls out there. In all honest truth (someone told me this which I now see is very true) "your only making your life worse by thinking you could have been together forever, shes not worth your time and you should be glad it happend now instead of 10 years down the road after you were already married" So, think about it, and I know your trying to find a 'magical' answer on what to do, but your not going to find it, I didnt, you wont, the next person wont either. It just takes time. Play with your celica, go work out (might as well better yourself for the next girl that comes along), go to church, just go driiiiiiiiiivvveee.... and one day, you will meet a girl, that you will be SO GLAD you passed up all the others for.

This post has been edited by bloodrain: Dec 18, 2005 - 2:30 PM

[ILuvMyCelica95]

ok ...so i finally read you post...lol

she said "too be honest with you, I want to focus on .....(insert dumb excuse here)

if you ever hear that line from a girl again, it ALWAYS means that she found another guy. i had some chick i was dating, years ago tell me the same thing, then i found out she was cheating on me..

so very true! i just told a guy 2 weeks ago that I wanted to focus on bettering myself but it was really cuz I met another boy.

Give it a few weeks and ull be over the girl. Also there are SOOOO many people in this world that theres no reason to be down if someone parts ways with you.

See now, I hate that. No one is honest anymore. Why not just tell them you aren't interested... I just can't justify or stand lying to people. Then if they find out you're really with someone else you've been caught in your lie. Idk, maybe I'm just weird.


and I know not everyone is going to agree with what I said, but if you look at it that way it will help you feel a little better about it, again its just my opinion.

[JoKeRkId613]

I don't really post on this section... but I must. EVERYONE... listen to me when I say this. MySpace is going to end the world. Okay, now back onto the issue at hand. I feel your pain, my friend. It's true, it's stupid to say "she was crap and you'll find better and bla bla bla". Cuz heck, you might not! It's the truth. There are a billion other girls in the world and always keep that in mind. I think what happened to you sucks. Sounds like puppy love type of sh!t, but nonetheless, still can hurt a lot. So I feel you man. I just got off a 2 year relationship and that girl was a crazy bitch. I pretty much sold out all my friends for that girl and now that I look at it, she's going out with some fag who I fought once and nearly killed. Not that I'm a fighter, but this kid was just skin and bones. Same age as me. I'm 18 and my ex 17. So she's going out with a loser and I now feel bad for him too cuz she's a little girl and very immature. All I can tell you is, hang out with your friends as much as possible or do fun things to get your mind off it. I work on the Celica all the time to keep myself busy if I'm not at school or working. You'll soon see you're better off single and also have more money in your pocket. Pimp hoes, whatever makes you happy bro. Oh, and don't join the Army. Those people end up crazy. No really, I have a couple of friends that are in Iraq right now and the first time they came, they were completely changed... and not for the better, IMO. They're coming back in February so that means it's going to be party time soon. Goodluck with your situation man.

[azian_advanced]

ok ...so i finally read you post...lol

she said "too be honest with you, I want to focus on .....(insert dumb excuse here)

if you ever hear that line from a girl again, it ALWAYS means that she found another guy. i had some chick i was dating, years ago tell me the same thing, then i found out she was cheating on me.

girls are all about 2 things..... 1. DRAMA. 2. mind games. the younger they are the more they do it. luckly later on in life they tend to grow out of it.

she used to like you, but you were not agressive enough. girls are looking for someone to step in and take the lead. while you were trying to just be friends with her, some guy steped in and took the lead.

the only way you can get over it is by finding a hotter girl then her. then you will forget about her and she will start to think of you again.... and the cycle will continue.

ditto on this. i'm not saying all girls are like this but only that this happened to me a year ago. i started liking this one girl for about 2 years so much that i never had the guts to tell her. she finds out that i liked her from another coworker and she told me she liked me. we went out a few times after but then had to go away on a trip. then on the day of my return, she tells me that she's failing her classes and needed to FOCUS on school to bring up her grades and prepare for university. next thing i find out she's going out with some other guy! then my coworker told me the truth about how she couldn't really care less about her school/university.. i was so upset i couldn't sleep for 3 days.. and even after that, i had trouble falling asleep cuz i couldn't stop thinking about her. my coworker told her how i felt so she became upset about it and started hating me. then now she brags about how much she LOVES her other bf and all i can say is "woman.. how can you say that when you don't even know what love feels like.." she says it like she's proud of it.. everybody can see through her and started hating her back. then problems grew more and more and she ended up finding another job.

anyway, i totally feel for you about all this. girls like a guy who's more outgoing and know how to take the lead in a relationship and keep things interesting. and when they get bored, they dump you and look for somebody else or cheat on you. and to be cheated on is the worst feeling ever.. sometimes, being friends is so much better than being lovers. if i could have changed things, i would've just stayed friends instead..

but now i have a girl that keeps me from thinking about the past,
one i love being with and understands my passion for cars,
and is so much better than that last girl,
my celi.

[BlackCelicaGT94]

agreed - myspace/internet profiles will ruin the world! ive had boys meet girls from the net and end up leaving me for them!

I dont ever wanna hurt a guy so i just tell him that i wanna focus on myself. I cant bring myself to tell a guy "ur not what i want" that hurts to hear and its hard to say!