Questions that really need answers, funny! Options

[BlackCelicaGT94]

Questions that really need answers...







1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"





2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt."



3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?



4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares,why is there a song about him?



5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?



6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?



7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?



8. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!



9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?



10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?



11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?




12. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?




13. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?




Stop singing and read on..........



14. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?




15. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?




16. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?



17. Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place?






Are you still singing the alphabet song??????

[neoklis]

I really dont think that someone was supposed to answer these questions. I had an email with such questions much funnier than that, if i find it i will post it.

edit: found this for now:

* The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

* Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:

Spades - King David,

Hearts - Charlemagne,

Clubs -Alexander, the Great

Diamonds - Julius Caesar


* 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321


* If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.


* "I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.


* Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month?

A. Conception.


* Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you could find the letter "A"?

A. One thousand.



* Q. What do bullet-proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?

A. All invented by women.


* Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?

A. Honey


* In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed

firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight".


* It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month or what we know today as the honeymoon.


* In ancient England a person could not have sex unless you had consent of the King (unless you were in the Royal Family). When anyone wanted to have a baby, they got consent of the King, the King gave them a placard that they hung on their door while they were having sex.

* The placard had F.*.* K (Fornication Under Consent of the King) on it. Now you know where that word came from.


* In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen. Only, Ladies Forbidden... and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.



This post has been edited by neoklis: Dec 10, 2004 - 10:54 AM