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[Supersprynt]

Ok so this has kept me up nights...

So in the first Terminator movie, Kyle Reese comes back from the future, sent by John Connor to protect his mother's life. So Reese sleeps with Sarah Connor and she has a child, John Connor. So how does someone exist prior to sending his father back in time to knock up his mother?

[Supersprynt]

Well there is the theory Art presented, where the first Terminator going back in time already changes things, so Connor sent Reese back in time to not only protect Sarah, but also to conceive a child. This is never said in the movie, but it is plausible. This would indicate that Reese and the Terminator going back in time changed only Sarah's life, and not the future of the world as a whole. Since John Connor is an intricate part of the resistance, he needed to ensure that he would actually exist.

So before 1984, John Connor became the resistance leader by chance, while after the Reese/Terminator time travel, and Reese explaining how John was in the future, he basically assured that Sarah would mold him into the soldier he needed to be. So even though he was most likely not the same looking, and maybe slightly different personality etc. he was still "John Connor - resistance leader" and that's the important part.