Am I in the wrong?, Just venting, folks. Options

[SwissFerdi]

Just to clear things up from the start, I live with my dad. His girlfriend pays for groceries, and my dad pays for college tuition and books (I have a scholarship covering 78 dollars per credit hour). However, I don't contribute monetarily to the household. My mother, on the other hand, pays for my insurance (health, car) and paid for the car itself...pretty much providing me with everything else I need. My parents are divorced.

Having said that, my dad is pretty strict, stubborn, hard-headed, and close-minded. I have no problem with the guy most of the time. However, I had a girl over last night, we watched a movie and just chilled, cuddled, etc., nothing more. She ended up staying over for the night (and I was just enlightened again that this is not acceptable). Apparently his girlfriend noticed she was still there in the morning (don't know how) and told him, along with the fact that I left some dirty dishes on the counter-top from when we made food. So he calls me up and reams me a new one for breaking some ground rules...well, the fact is that a) nothing happened, b) his girlfriend did not inquire whatsoever to the situation, I haven't even talked to her about it since I haven't seen her, and C), he does not know the girl since he's away to work and I basically just met her. I did introduce her to his girlfriend when we came in.

So basically, I feel like this is unnecessarily overprotective. I'm 19, an adult by American standards, responsible, and respectful of the rules. There's no way I'll have Ferdi Jr.'s running around anytime soon, and it's ridiculous to be so protective when he hasn't even met the girl yet.

All in all, I really like this girl and she feels the same way, so I don't want a potential relationship to be ruined because of this.

This post has been edited by SwissFerdi: Oct 13, 2009 - 9:43 PM

[Random_Stranger]

Man, you want to know something funny? My mom is like your dad. I am 27 and just moved back home. Now, since I am getting old, my mother DOES want me to have a girlfriend and have them over, but the problem is, I spent so much of my life chasing girls, that now? Now I don't even care about all that. After seeing how a lot of women are, and seeing what I am more passionate about (cars, duh), I just meet girls and treat them like any guy friend of mine (strangely, this plays them into my hands more than ever, but whatever). Anyways, I moved out when I was 24 for a year or so, and before then, my mom would get mad if my girlfriend (who she really liked very much by the way, as well as my whole entire family) did stay the night. She would say things like "You need to respect her and not do anything with her like that" or "This ain't no Hotel!" and that was how I was brought up. She did baby me for a long time growing up, which I can understand why even now, she may have her moments, which is fine because I understand that in her eyes, I will always be her baby (usually happens to the 1st born).

So, perhaps your dad is just concerned about you getting a girl pregnant, or if you did in fact leave dirty dishes (which I get reamed for as well, as it is my job to clean up at night) that you might let having a girlfriend affect and gain priority over your responsibilities. Which, to you may not seem like a big idea, leaving a few dirty dishes, however in the eyes of a parent who may be over protective, yet wants to raise you in such a fashion, may see it that way.

It's not a big deal, just respect them no matter how silly because it won't be like that forever and when you have your own place you can do whatever you wish. But when you live with roommates and you see how truly different people are due to how they were brought up, you will understand why they are like that.

Having said that, I had a roommate that had no regards for anyone else. Had his girlfriend over every single day, even when she was sick. Always watching tv in the living room "their shows", showering together in a bathroom I shared with him (which I thought was gross considering they are both dirty people and my stuff was in there, so I moved my things into my other roommates bathroom), and splitting the garage/driveway between my other roommate with me on one side, and my other roommates crusty azz car and his crusty gf's car on the other side (who didn't take good care or care for the exterior of their cars by the way).

So in the end, being raised a certain way affects how you live with others I suppose. Sometimes they are things you shouldn't let get to you, however they do because of how you were raised. Sorry I wrote a lot, but hope you see this all in another light.